Worth. Self worth. It's an incredible topic. It's also a sore spot. When people really take time to think about how they value themselves, if they really think they're worth it, it opens up a world of insecurities. Deep down, I think we all are struggling with if we're good enough, or if we're worth something. We each have our own way of dealing with what we find, but the question is still there.
This is something that's been on my mind for a while now. That is, since February, when I was suddenly confronted with the revelation that I didn't believe in me, didn't trust that I was worth it. Let me tell you, it was not a pleasant experience. Ever since that day, I've noticed Insecurity rearing it's ugly head all around me. Once I really stopped and looked at me, that is, alllllll of me(insecurities, failures, successes, strengths) I found ME. And it was almost like I was seeing myself for the first time.
I was afraid to accept everything about me. Afraid to embrace it all, because it's not all pretty stuff. In the moment that I found ME, I began to really understand Jesus. Me and Jesus, yeah, we're buddies and we have been for as long as I can remember. This was a profoundly different experience though. Think about it: Jesus Christ fell. GOD FELL! He fell 3 times. And each time, He got up. He got up, and kept walking towards His death.
Now tell me, how does that make sense? No. It really doesn't. Plain and simple. And that's God. He doesn't make sense. But He does. I love it!!!! "The foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength." God is the King of Contradictions; He brings us out of our natural inclinations, and draws us up into our higher, better, spiritual nature. What He says makes sense but doesn't at the same time. Somehow, that is a beautiful wonderful, powerful, crazy awesome thing!
My main point is this: everyone struggles with feeling worthy or wanted. Guess what? You are good. I'll say it again. You are good. You don't have to earn it, you don't have to do anything at all, in fact. Simply because you are, simply because you exist, you are good.
Wanna know why Jesus was crazy enough to get up 3 times? Wanna know why He embraced His Cross? Wanna know why He kept getting up, and walking to His death?
It was for you.
You don't have to do anything, or be anything.
He thinks you're worth it.
If God, the Creator of the universe, the Source of all that is good, thinks you're worth it, believe me, my friend, you are.